I have been wrecking my brain thinking about who to vote for and there is only one day left and I am only clear on one thing. There isn't a single person among the current candidates that I want to vote for! Now this is a true dilemma considering I really want to vote as my vote counts and blah blah. I was really wishing and praying for some new person to pop up but no such luck. Now I have to choose a joker from the lot.
Gasim - I don't believe he can change anything. The guy is entertaining though, what with the bad speech reading and repeating and everything. I particularly loved the fact that he went to islands and insisted on shaking hands with both hands to the utter shock of the people who were gathered. I mean this guy is the candidate of the most Extreme Habees and he goes around shaking hands with his left hand. I wonder what they have to say about it. Not to mention his lack of etiquette and manners while he was on TVM news one night where he wiped his nose with his hand and held out his hand to the news caster to the utter horror of that guy.
Anni - His whole other Maldives thing really scares me. Is Anni trying to move the island like they did in Lost? He does say somethings that does make some sense but the fact that they started out with so much violence really scares me and I certainly don't know what's going to happen if they come into power. Also, feels like too much foreign influence as well. Now I might be wrong as I have no evidence of anything but too much gossip makes me uncomfortable.
Umar - Is there anything more to say about this guy besides the fact that he plans on killing everybody and creating a whole new population of perfect people sired by him? So no for him from me atleast. I am sure there are some people who are convinced he is the guy for the job.
Ibra - He talks sense too but seems he is too much of a whiner about somethings. I mean, do we really want a whiner for a president?
Hasan - Well this guy actually makes some sense but I really don't enjoy the whole dirty campaiging going on between his camp and DRP. It's just simply ridiculous and I don't enjoy that at all.
Maumoon - Oh well. Nothing to say here. Apparently it doesn't matter whether I vote for him or not. It's obvious he is going to win this election. I mean he has won every other election before so why should it be any different for him this time either? I am sure he has something up his sleeve to win this time too. So that makes the whole voting process obsolete no?
I know, I know. That everyone says it's going to be a fair election and all. I am not convinced. I feel like there is going to be a whole lot of violence though. That's one thing that scares me. I guess there really isn't a lot of time to wait for it now. Just one more day and it's over.....or is it the beginning of something new or the same ol?
Monday, 6 October 2008
Thursday, 21 June 2007
Nightmare Bosses!
29 August 2006
We all have dreams and aims. Everyone of us needs to have jobs in order to pursue our dreams, if we are lucky, we get our dream jobs. But in our wildest dreams, we never imagine that our own boss or employer could actually come to be the problem at our dream job. Sadly, this is a most common thing here in the Maldives and probably elsewhere in the world as well. However, focusing on Maldives let me tell you about some nightmarish bosses or employers some people have had the misfortune of having.
A friend of mine did her degree and diploma and was searching frantically for a job since she was almost always over qualified for all the positions she had applied for. However, her break came when a well known travel company invited her to join their prestigious company.
Impressed, since it was a pretty famous company, and joyous, at finally getting a job, she went off to work for the company. Little did she know the reputation of her boss since she had been studying abroad for almost four years. After working there for a couple of weeks, her boss asked her in for a meeting that was after her actual working hours.
Thinking nothing of it, she went in and found that she was the only one he was meeting on this particular night. Let’s just say that he made some advances and she right out refused and almost slapped her boss and walked out of the meeting. It seems that since she was the new meat in office, he just wanted to see if she was easy as the rest of the female staff working there.
After discussing her dilemma with some of her other workmates, she came to realize that it was quite common for these ‘meetings’ to go on in his office and if the person actually granted his wishes, one could be the next one joining him on his many trips to other parts of the country. My friend did not want anything to do with this place and quit immediately.
This is not the only type of employers you meet at work. At least she was over qualified for the job she was hired for. But not in the case of Naila who was employed after an interview with a director of a company. She was hired simply because she was ‘fair’ and ‘easy on the eyes’ according to the director. Since she was quite desperate at the moment, as everyone knows how difficult it is to find a job these days, she thought she would work there till she could find another better job.
Alas, it was not to be! One day, she walked in on the said boss going through some pictures of hers. Being a headstrong woman, she walked in and demanded that he delete all her pictures from his computer. Apparently, the director had recently bought a camera phone and was collecting her pictures according to the day of the week and he had collected all her pictures for every week since she had been hired! She decided to speak to the other directors there and this other director, who turned out to be the human resources guy, was fired immediately.
In the case of Shaila, she actually did not have to work since she was hired. She was bored at work since her boss thought of her more as part of the decoration and decided to do everything for her. Now as flattering as this might be, Shaila decided to quit after just two weeks since the boredom was killing her and she did not think she deserved the money he was paying her to just sit at a desk in his office, since her boss had asked her not to associate at all with the other two female employees in the office.
I notice I have mentioned only females, but sometimes, there are male employees who have to suffer as well. Ahmed was employed at a well known company as a Purchasing Officer. He was to find out later that this also meant the purchasing of his personal groceries and anything else his boss was asked to buy, by his wife. It might be ok if this happened only once, but it came to the point where Ahmed realized he was actually a sort of ‘housemaid’ for his boss without getting paid for the extra hours he had to put in to finish his boss’ grocery list and other personal affects.
Now, if you are just newly coming into the working environment, take this as a warning. One might think that this is quite rare and this happens to only few people due to how they behave or due to the sort of job they have. But this could happen to anyone, anywhere. It doesn’t depend on the sort of job you have, it depends on what type of boss you might have. It is always good to check out the background of a company and the possible employers before actually applying for jobs.
Perhaps this is how the working environment has been since the beginning of time; otherwise, there won’t be so many boss jokes making the rounds right?
Note: All names are changed; however, all the mentioned nightmare bosses are 100% real!
We all have dreams and aims. Everyone of us needs to have jobs in order to pursue our dreams, if we are lucky, we get our dream jobs. But in our wildest dreams, we never imagine that our own boss or employer could actually come to be the problem at our dream job. Sadly, this is a most common thing here in the Maldives and probably elsewhere in the world as well. However, focusing on Maldives let me tell you about some nightmarish bosses or employers some people have had the misfortune of having.
A friend of mine did her degree and diploma and was searching frantically for a job since she was almost always over qualified for all the positions she had applied for. However, her break came when a well known travel company invited her to join their prestigious company.
Impressed, since it was a pretty famous company, and joyous, at finally getting a job, she went off to work for the company. Little did she know the reputation of her boss since she had been studying abroad for almost four years. After working there for a couple of weeks, her boss asked her in for a meeting that was after her actual working hours.
Thinking nothing of it, she went in and found that she was the only one he was meeting on this particular night. Let’s just say that he made some advances and she right out refused and almost slapped her boss and walked out of the meeting. It seems that since she was the new meat in office, he just wanted to see if she was easy as the rest of the female staff working there.
After discussing her dilemma with some of her other workmates, she came to realize that it was quite common for these ‘meetings’ to go on in his office and if the person actually granted his wishes, one could be the next one joining him on his many trips to other parts of the country. My friend did not want anything to do with this place and quit immediately.
This is not the only type of employers you meet at work. At least she was over qualified for the job she was hired for. But not in the case of Naila who was employed after an interview with a director of a company. She was hired simply because she was ‘fair’ and ‘easy on the eyes’ according to the director. Since she was quite desperate at the moment, as everyone knows how difficult it is to find a job these days, she thought she would work there till she could find another better job.
Alas, it was not to be! One day, she walked in on the said boss going through some pictures of hers. Being a headstrong woman, she walked in and demanded that he delete all her pictures from his computer. Apparently, the director had recently bought a camera phone and was collecting her pictures according to the day of the week and he had collected all her pictures for every week since she had been hired! She decided to speak to the other directors there and this other director, who turned out to be the human resources guy, was fired immediately.
In the case of Shaila, she actually did not have to work since she was hired. She was bored at work since her boss thought of her more as part of the decoration and decided to do everything for her. Now as flattering as this might be, Shaila decided to quit after just two weeks since the boredom was killing her and she did not think she deserved the money he was paying her to just sit at a desk in his office, since her boss had asked her not to associate at all with the other two female employees in the office.
I notice I have mentioned only females, but sometimes, there are male employees who have to suffer as well. Ahmed was employed at a well known company as a Purchasing Officer. He was to find out later that this also meant the purchasing of his personal groceries and anything else his boss was asked to buy, by his wife. It might be ok if this happened only once, but it came to the point where Ahmed realized he was actually a sort of ‘housemaid’ for his boss without getting paid for the extra hours he had to put in to finish his boss’ grocery list and other personal affects.
Now, if you are just newly coming into the working environment, take this as a warning. One might think that this is quite rare and this happens to only few people due to how they behave or due to the sort of job they have. But this could happen to anyone, anywhere. It doesn’t depend on the sort of job you have, it depends on what type of boss you might have. It is always good to check out the background of a company and the possible employers before actually applying for jobs.
Perhaps this is how the working environment has been since the beginning of time; otherwise, there won’t be so many boss jokes making the rounds right?
Note: All names are changed; however, all the mentioned nightmare bosses are 100% real!
El Stinko!
29 August 2006
“When you swap shirts at the end of the match you expect it to smell bad. But Beck’s smelt really nice.” Ronaldo
You could be anywhere, minding your own business and innocently smelling fresh air, well as fresh as it gets in Male, when it hits you. Everyone has come across this, at different places. It could strike when least expected and you never know what hits you. But it leaves a long lasting smell of BO behind. Watch out! It’s the new breed of people who do not believe in using anything artificial to make themselves smell good. Au naturel! Perhaps what these people have not realized is that the dark ages are gone and it is not an aphrodisiac anymore. Perhaps Tarzan might be turned on by this smell, but we normal humans could live without it! Just because we can’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not there!
Studies and so many resources are being spent on the study of smells and the production of good smelling products. People have dedicated their whole lives to this one particular sense, the sense of smell. Yet, it is amazing how we still come across such stinky people in our daily lives. Scientists report that the ability to smell depends on the person’s state of mental and physical health, with some very healthy 80-year-olds having the same olfactory prowess as young adults. Women consistently out-perform men on all tests of smelling ability.
Smoking is believed to reduce the sensitivity to smell. This might explain why most smokers stink. Studies have shown that schizophrenics, depressives, migraine sufferers and very-low-weight anorexics often experience olfactory deficits or dysfunctions; meaning that their sense of smell does not work well. But I think that the people who refuse to use a deodorant actually know they do stink and perhaps have grown immune to their own BO and we have just not grown immune to it yet.
With all the good smelling stuff around, I cannot imagine why anyone would prefer not to wear something to smell good. Every single thing on sale smells of something and mostly its good smells. Then why do people still refuse to wear any kind of perfume and opt to go out into public smelling like you haven’t taken a shower in ages? Now, this simply doesn’t mean that it’s just the people who have not taken a shower that smell this bad. It’s sad but unfortunately and quite unbelievably, I have come across young people who seem to be wearing their evening best and whatnot and once they pass you by, don’t take a deep breath for surely you would gag! It’s so terrible that I am at a loss for words to describe this particular stink!
The places where most people congregate, for example, like the school areas. All the parents are there, some come in cars, others wait in the hot sun, pressed up against each other in their hurry to get their children out of the crowd and move on. Now this is a place where every parent who shows up knows that a lot of other people are going to be within smelling distance of each other, or perhaps possible within distance of leaving a smell on someone else too. Any parent, who tries to smell good when going out in public, will know what I am talking about.
Shafiya, a parent who has to go quite frequently to fetch her kid to and from school, has to suffer the smell and usually takes a shower right after she gets home. She says ‘I know that most parents are very busy and all, even I am busy, but I still make an effort not to smell like I just poured a bowl of Garudhiya over my head before I go to fetch my child. It’s horrible enough that it is in the hot sun, but people should at least be considerate enough of the people around her. ‘
Strangely enough, the prices of beauty products are so low! And ironically you come across stinky salespeople who are actually selling perfumes and deodorants. It’s very common in some shops, perhaps they do not have set rules for this type of things, but I think there should be. If you are to wait near while a stinky person reaches up for something from a higher shelf, well, phew! Best of luck to you on breathing ever again!
It’s not just the body that stinks. I once had a cable guy come into my air-conditioned sitting room and I had to turn it off and open all the doors since his socks stank so much I thought I would throw up. He was there to fix my cable TV, so naturally he had to be there for some time. I wonder if he had heard of a thing called foot deodorant. Or even changing socks everyday or anything, just to make sure he does not stink up every place he goes to!
There are suggestions that smell can influence mood, memory, emotions and mate choice. Since smells play such an important part in our lives, wouldn’t you want to smell good whenever you step out of the house? It is such an easy thing to do. Simply spend a bit of your monthly income on a deodorant; a roll-on is always a good choice and keep a spray deodorant as well. Colognes are good as well. So many types of nice smelling products to choose from in all the shops. It is also important to take a good shower with a lot of scrubbing as simply spraying on perfume does not help if you already stink. There are products to make our laundry smell good as well as when ironing. Basically, you could smell good, your clothes could smell good and you can make them smell good! So why not invest some of your time and money into this. Who knows how many potential customers, clients, lovers or friends you have already scared off with your smell?
“When you swap shirts at the end of the match you expect it to smell bad. But Beck’s smelt really nice.” Ronaldo
You could be anywhere, minding your own business and innocently smelling fresh air, well as fresh as it gets in Male, when it hits you. Everyone has come across this, at different places. It could strike when least expected and you never know what hits you. But it leaves a long lasting smell of BO behind. Watch out! It’s the new breed of people who do not believe in using anything artificial to make themselves smell good. Au naturel! Perhaps what these people have not realized is that the dark ages are gone and it is not an aphrodisiac anymore. Perhaps Tarzan might be turned on by this smell, but we normal humans could live without it! Just because we can’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not there!
Studies and so many resources are being spent on the study of smells and the production of good smelling products. People have dedicated their whole lives to this one particular sense, the sense of smell. Yet, it is amazing how we still come across such stinky people in our daily lives. Scientists report that the ability to smell depends on the person’s state of mental and physical health, with some very healthy 80-year-olds having the same olfactory prowess as young adults. Women consistently out-perform men on all tests of smelling ability.
Smoking is believed to reduce the sensitivity to smell. This might explain why most smokers stink. Studies have shown that schizophrenics, depressives, migraine sufferers and very-low-weight anorexics often experience olfactory deficits or dysfunctions; meaning that their sense of smell does not work well. But I think that the people who refuse to use a deodorant actually know they do stink and perhaps have grown immune to their own BO and we have just not grown immune to it yet.
With all the good smelling stuff around, I cannot imagine why anyone would prefer not to wear something to smell good. Every single thing on sale smells of something and mostly its good smells. Then why do people still refuse to wear any kind of perfume and opt to go out into public smelling like you haven’t taken a shower in ages? Now, this simply doesn’t mean that it’s just the people who have not taken a shower that smell this bad. It’s sad but unfortunately and quite unbelievably, I have come across young people who seem to be wearing their evening best and whatnot and once they pass you by, don’t take a deep breath for surely you would gag! It’s so terrible that I am at a loss for words to describe this particular stink!
The places where most people congregate, for example, like the school areas. All the parents are there, some come in cars, others wait in the hot sun, pressed up against each other in their hurry to get their children out of the crowd and move on. Now this is a place where every parent who shows up knows that a lot of other people are going to be within smelling distance of each other, or perhaps possible within distance of leaving a smell on someone else too. Any parent, who tries to smell good when going out in public, will know what I am talking about.
Shafiya, a parent who has to go quite frequently to fetch her kid to and from school, has to suffer the smell and usually takes a shower right after she gets home. She says ‘I know that most parents are very busy and all, even I am busy, but I still make an effort not to smell like I just poured a bowl of Garudhiya over my head before I go to fetch my child. It’s horrible enough that it is in the hot sun, but people should at least be considerate enough of the people around her. ‘
Strangely enough, the prices of beauty products are so low! And ironically you come across stinky salespeople who are actually selling perfumes and deodorants. It’s very common in some shops, perhaps they do not have set rules for this type of things, but I think there should be. If you are to wait near while a stinky person reaches up for something from a higher shelf, well, phew! Best of luck to you on breathing ever again!
It’s not just the body that stinks. I once had a cable guy come into my air-conditioned sitting room and I had to turn it off and open all the doors since his socks stank so much I thought I would throw up. He was there to fix my cable TV, so naturally he had to be there for some time. I wonder if he had heard of a thing called foot deodorant. Or even changing socks everyday or anything, just to make sure he does not stink up every place he goes to!
There are suggestions that smell can influence mood, memory, emotions and mate choice. Since smells play such an important part in our lives, wouldn’t you want to smell good whenever you step out of the house? It is such an easy thing to do. Simply spend a bit of your monthly income on a deodorant; a roll-on is always a good choice and keep a spray deodorant as well. Colognes are good as well. So many types of nice smelling products to choose from in all the shops. It is also important to take a good shower with a lot of scrubbing as simply spraying on perfume does not help if you already stink. There are products to make our laundry smell good as well as when ironing. Basically, you could smell good, your clothes could smell good and you can make them smell good! So why not invest some of your time and money into this. Who knows how many potential customers, clients, lovers or friends you have already scared off with your smell?
The holy month...musings
"Fast to be healthy," had said the Prophet (s.a.w.).
I was just thinking about Ramazan and wanted to see what it was really all about. I googled a bit and these are what I found out about it. Since it is said to be healthy, how come most of us gain weight instead of losing any? It is said to be a test of our endurance levels yet, we come across more people without any tolerance for others. The purpose of the whole month sometimes seems lost on everyone. What is the holy month of Ramazan really about?
Ramazan. That nice time of year when the amount of everyone's belief is heightened and more people end up going to the mosque, resulting in people praying on the roads. It's just like the Friday prayers. More people turn up for this prayer than any other. Everyone talks about it. All the roads empty out during the Magrib prayers when everyone goes to break their fast and pray.
While fasting and going hungry shortens our tempers and makes us less reasonable, it is the strength to over come such weakness that really counts. It is a test of our true faith and belief in our selves as well. It is about keeping ones ego in check and becoming a holistic person with a healthy self image and having a positive outlook on life. If we were to fast without praying a single prayer, there is really no need for us to be fasting. On the other hand, if we were fasting and praying yet, did not give a second thought about others and be inconsiderate and mean, there really is no purpose to your fast. It is meaningless since the whole aspect of it is lost apparently.
Ramazan is the month of fasting, intensive prayer, sacrifice and Divine worship. It is most important to remember this. However, most of us think of this month as a month where we come up with new recipes. More food is wasted in the month of Ramazan every year than any other month here in theMaldives
For Maldivians, it is a time to show off their new expensive 'toys'. Everyone who can afford to, gets rid of their old car or motorcycle at cheap prices in their hurry to get a new, cool and flashier model for this month. It is a time for racing in the late evenings and into the night. The number of accidents alleviate during this month as more people take to the streets in style and with speed.
Perhaps it is a little known fact among most Maldivians but during Eid, it is tradition among most Muslim countries to give gifts to each other. It is a symbol of peace, friendship and brotherhood. However, this is not very commonly practiced among us. The more commonly used word 'Eid-Milan', literally means, 'embracing and celebrating together'. How come we don't celebrate in this way?
More people tend to recite the Qur’an during the nights said to be Lailathul Gadhri, however, there must a divine reason for the concealment of this date. Maybe it is for this very purpose. Should we do more on these nights alone? In some households no one is allowed to do anything other than recite the quran and pray on these certain nights, but is that how it should be?
The revelations of the Holy Qur'an commenced in this holy month. It is truly a holy month as many epic events in the Islamic history took place during this month. However, it does not mean that we are supposed to pray and be obedient servants of God only during this month. It is perhaps practice for everyone, to live like this, every month of the year.
I was just thinking about Ramazan and wanted to see what it was really all about. I googled a bit and these are what I found out about it. Since it is said to be healthy, how come most of us gain weight instead of losing any? It is said to be a test of our endurance levels yet, we come across more people without any tolerance for others. The purpose of the whole month sometimes seems lost on everyone. What is the holy month of Ramazan really about?
Ramazan. That nice time of year when the amount of everyone's belief is heightened and more people end up going to the mosque, resulting in people praying on the roads. It's just like the Friday prayers. More people turn up for this prayer than any other. Everyone talks about it. All the roads empty out during the Magrib prayers when everyone goes to break their fast and pray.
While fasting and going hungry shortens our tempers and makes us less reasonable, it is the strength to over come such weakness that really counts. It is a test of our true faith and belief in our selves as well. It is about keeping ones ego in check and becoming a holistic person with a healthy self image and having a positive outlook on life. If we were to fast without praying a single prayer, there is really no need for us to be fasting. On the other hand, if we were fasting and praying yet, did not give a second thought about others and be inconsiderate and mean, there really is no purpose to your fast. It is meaningless since the whole aspect of it is lost apparently.
Ramazan is the month of fasting, intensive prayer, sacrifice and Divine worship. It is most important to remember this. However, most of us think of this month as a month where we come up with new recipes. More food is wasted in the month of Ramazan every year than any other month here in the
For Maldivians, it is a time to show off their new expensive 'toys'. Everyone who can afford to, gets rid of their old car or motorcycle at cheap prices in their hurry to get a new, cool and flashier model for this month. It is a time for racing in the late evenings and into the night. The number of accidents alleviate during this month as more people take to the streets in style and with speed.
Perhaps it is a little known fact among most Maldivians but during Eid, it is tradition among most Muslim countries to give gifts to each other. It is a symbol of peace, friendship and brotherhood. However, this is not very commonly practiced among us. The more commonly used word 'Eid-Milan', literally means, 'embracing and celebrating together'. How come we don't celebrate in this way?
More people tend to recite the Qur’an during the nights said to be Lailathul Gadhri, however, there must a divine reason for the concealment of this date. Maybe it is for this very purpose. Should we do more on these nights alone? In some households no one is allowed to do anything other than recite the quran and pray on these certain nights, but is that how it should be?
The revelations of the Holy Qur'an commenced in this holy month. It is truly a holy month as many epic events in the Islamic history took place during this month. However, it does not mean that we are supposed to pray and be obedient servants of God only during this month. It is perhaps practice for everyone, to live like this, every month of the year.
Don't Demand Respect, Earn It
25 July 2006
When did the Maldivian culture evolve into such an environment where love, respect and caring are seen as traits to be ridiculed?
Remember the days when love was the reason you got into a relationship? A time when people used to respect each other and care for each other; wanted relationships to end up in marriage? Times when courting periods were shorter and marriages lasted longer? When people wrote sweet poetry on leafs, or on the ‘fanvaiy’ of houses for each other in much earlier times? Maybe some of us do but most of the people these days have no clue what it is all about.
People no longer believe in love at first sight; now it’s lust at first sight. People do not have relationships, instead there are flings and affairs which everyone wants to forget and get over to the next conquest as soon as possible. Men want to add to their little black book or their mobile phonebook. Women are more sexual than ever before. We see everything from scantily clad women to the “buruga” clad women. It doesn’t matter how they are dressed or which sex they are, anyone could be having an affair outside marriage or with a married person. Some prefer their careers over relationships unless it just happens. However, what I want to know is, when did we stop respecting each other?
In a recent conversation with some male office mates, it became apparent that they did not think much of women. For them, there were the pretty girls, meaning the women who had no qualms about revealing all and no inhibitions at all and then there were the ‘foni’ women, the ones who actually had some kind of respect for themselves, whom they believed were either hiding something, or needed some kind of a lesson to be taught by a man. They thought more about which one they could easily ‘get’ and some men even go so far as to claim that women these days are so easy, they could have their pick of them. People are dating on dares or bets.
It’s the same for women. They don’t think much of Maldivian men either. In fact, women have relationships online with total strangers out of the country rather than socialize locally and meet someone face to face. Of course, there are the women who are dating around and trying to find someone to settle on or not, and these are the women who usually get no respect from anyone. They are deemed to be easy and the ‘havaru thunfohi’ or something similar. Everyone it seems is very misunderstood in their own way. No shy innocents anymore, everyone is jaded. How and why did this happen and when did it come about?
Perhaps it could have begun when people started having all this freedom for themselves, to do whatever they want and whenever they want. Of course, this isn’t such a bad thing in some ways. There is a saying somewhere that feminism was created by men just so that men could take advantage of it. There could be some truth to that. When a woman dates around, she becomes a ‘badi’ instantly, whilst a man could date around and be looking for the right one. That’s acceptable and good. What’s up with that?
Married men are having affairs with young girls half their age. Both are actually to blame in this, however, usually the women are blamed more than the men. The wives would think it’s the other woman’s fault for stealing their husband. What about the husband who doesn’t seem to care much for the sacred vow he took when marrying? Granted our religion allows a man to have more than one wife but if we are blaming someone why is it just the woman you should take it? How come he doesn’t get the blame for going to the other woman? Men and women are to be blamed equally for these.
We are losing respect for each other and slowly losing faith, and trust is something which does not come easily to us anymore. How could we trust someone with such things constantly happening all around us? It’s only natural that this should happen. This is what our young population is seeing and believing and growing up in, this atmosphere of lies and deception. Respect is something that needs to be instilled in people at a young age or even later for it to be of any benefit to that person. This is simply not happening here anymore, in our society of affairs and broken families and children who grow up without proper care. What is going wrong with our society and why is this happening? I have no definite answers yet for these questions and I doubt anyone does.
Recently, a friend of mine decided to get a divorce for the umpteenth time after her husband continuously kept cheating on her with different women. Every time, she forgives him and gives him one more chance as they have been married for 15 years with three kids. Yet, she is being woken up almost every other night to the sound of phone calls to his mobile from a woman who claims to be ‘just a friend’ at two in the morning and SMSs proclaiming undying love for the husband. Her husband flat out refuses to acknowledge that there is anything going on, even when she catches him with other women occasionally. She still wants to give it a go as is the case with many single mothers here in the Maldives; it is not possible to raise three children alone without a lot of financial help from the father.
In this case as well, the husband, if he respected and cared for the wife, would not have done anything to hurt her or his children. It is not as if she had done anything either, as she is a stay at home mother who gets no free time between taking care of the children and her husband.
According to Family Court Law fathers are ordered to pay the set sum to the Court and the mothers who have custody of the children to collect their dues from the Court. Where fathers repeatedly fail to make Court-ordered child-support, they are penalized by being jailed for a period of 15 days. What good is that? It just makes things worse.
Also our family courts have not come up with a foolproof system for this type of situation and many a single mother with children are either trying to get by without the promised money from the divorced father, or trying to earn a living while raising the children. The laws concerning these needs to be revised as the amount that the father is to pay for the children’s upbringing is just not enough in this day and age. The costs of living expenses are high and a single mother without a job has to struggle with the measly amount that could come or not each month.
Simply filing for divorce does not give respite to the troubled wife either. Our courts would not give a divorce easy as it should be, especially when children are put into the equation and would give due ‘naseyhah’ or advice to both parties and ask them to try once again. I understand that this is done in an effort to bring down the divorce rate in Maldives, as we have already made it into world record books for having the highest divorce rates but this is getting ridiculous. Putting individuals concerned into such difficult situations, without any help or hope of getting to a happier solution, just to bring down the divorce rates and off the world record books is a bit too much.
According to law, you cannot file for divorce again before three months and the wife has to endure this once again for another three months as was the case with Nasheeda. Her husband was cheating on her with another woman. With four kids to take care of after fourteen years of marriage, she could not handle the emotional stress of it on her daily life and wanted the divorce soon. However, she had to endure almost half a year before the court gave her the divorce. She says: ‘It’s not as if they put us into marriage counseling or anything every time we go there when they send us off home so soon. He would continue to do as he wished and nothing would change. If only there was more to it only would this work.”
This is a most common situation here and it is a growing concern. The amount of children who grow up without proper care or love from their parents is too many. Single parents are not able to take care of their children properly while trying to earn a living. Most children do not respect their parents for the way they have been treated during their childhood and they grow up not respecting others and they do not have faith in relationships as obviously they have grown up in such an atmosphere where it is not something that is respected.
Abuse in marriages and relationships is another thing that is common in Maldives. What compels people to abuse their partners? It is considered that sometimes, people who come from such backgrounds tend to abuse others but this is not the case every time.
In a review carried out by the Ministry of Gender, Family Development and Social Security with the support of UNFPA in 2004/2005 of the Maldives Family Law, it was seen that the right of wives to petition for divorce did not necessarily translate to ‘access’ to divorce with only 10.45% of divorce petitions granted in 2000. Court records show that the wives who petitioned the Court for divorce got a favorable outcome only where the husband was ready and willing to give a divorce. In instances where husbands challenged and/or refused to divorce, the women were more often than not forced to go back home with their husbands; quite possibly to a relationship even more strained and harmful than before, due to the ‘crime’ of the wife having challenged the husband in public.
“Divorce was very rarely granted, even if violence or abuse was given as the reason for the petition. Of the cases where the court refused divorce/permission to divorce, 71.43 were wife-initiated petitions, and in all these cases the husbands had not agreed to the divorce. The grounds on which the Court based their decisions did not always reflect the grounds on which the petition was made. For example, 30% of the wife-initiated petitions had explicitly noted “the actions of the husband” - which could be anything from negligence to wife-abuse – as reason for requesting divorce, but the Court records did not reflect any attention to the issue.”
Source: www.planning.gov.mv
This review concludes that the Family Law analysis is far removed from the everyday realities of people. That currently the levels of maintenance are determined according to the circumstances of the husband (former husband) whatever the circumstances of the wife (former wife), which is problematic as it does not address needs in real terms. Further, the burden of providing maintenance falls upon the man regardless of the circumstances of the woman. Maintenance should be assessed and adjusted according to the means and circumstances of the concerned couple.
Why is this happening and why isn’t anyone concerned about this? Perhaps we have evolved past this whole love, care and trust thing now or simply gotten used to accepting that this is a myth. Just like we hear about fairies and unicorns, now we will read about love from books and see it only in movies. It’s not real at all.
Respect, care, love and understanding is something one can achieve through their own actions and attitude, it is something that is earned. One needs to earn the other persons respect. Perhaps this could be where one starts and maybe the rest will come naturally. I believe that our young generation needs good role models to look up to. It all starts at home where the first human experiences children feel are of the family around them. If it is how the children grow up, in a warm, caring environment where everyone respects one another, perhaps they would grow up to be more positive human beings, who respect, honor and above all have empathy for each other. Parents need to be shining examples. They must instruct and train their children on how to love their spouses and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be kind and helpful and respect each other. Perhaps they may have more faith in relationships and all walks of life as grownups.
When did the Maldivian culture evolve into such an environment where love, respect and caring are seen as traits to be ridiculed?
Remember the days when love was the reason you got into a relationship? A time when people used to respect each other and care for each other; wanted relationships to end up in marriage? Times when courting periods were shorter and marriages lasted longer? When people wrote sweet poetry on leafs, or on the ‘fanvaiy’ of houses for each other in much earlier times? Maybe some of us do but most of the people these days have no clue what it is all about.
People no longer believe in love at first sight; now it’s lust at first sight. People do not have relationships, instead there are flings and affairs which everyone wants to forget and get over to the next conquest as soon as possible. Men want to add to their little black book or their mobile phonebook. Women are more sexual than ever before. We see everything from scantily clad women to the “buruga” clad women. It doesn’t matter how they are dressed or which sex they are, anyone could be having an affair outside marriage or with a married person. Some prefer their careers over relationships unless it just happens. However, what I want to know is, when did we stop respecting each other?
In a recent conversation with some male office mates, it became apparent that they did not think much of women. For them, there were the pretty girls, meaning the women who had no qualms about revealing all and no inhibitions at all and then there were the ‘foni’ women, the ones who actually had some kind of respect for themselves, whom they believed were either hiding something, or needed some kind of a lesson to be taught by a man. They thought more about which one they could easily ‘get’ and some men even go so far as to claim that women these days are so easy, they could have their pick of them. People are dating on dares or bets.
It’s the same for women. They don’t think much of Maldivian men either. In fact, women have relationships online with total strangers out of the country rather than socialize locally and meet someone face to face. Of course, there are the women who are dating around and trying to find someone to settle on or not, and these are the women who usually get no respect from anyone. They are deemed to be easy and the ‘havaru thunfohi’ or something similar. Everyone it seems is very misunderstood in their own way. No shy innocents anymore, everyone is jaded. How and why did this happen and when did it come about?
Perhaps it could have begun when people started having all this freedom for themselves, to do whatever they want and whenever they want. Of course, this isn’t such a bad thing in some ways. There is a saying somewhere that feminism was created by men just so that men could take advantage of it. There could be some truth to that. When a woman dates around, she becomes a ‘badi’ instantly, whilst a man could date around and be looking for the right one. That’s acceptable and good. What’s up with that?
Married men are having affairs with young girls half their age. Both are actually to blame in this, however, usually the women are blamed more than the men. The wives would think it’s the other woman’s fault for stealing their husband. What about the husband who doesn’t seem to care much for the sacred vow he took when marrying? Granted our religion allows a man to have more than one wife but if we are blaming someone why is it just the woman you should take it? How come he doesn’t get the blame for going to the other woman? Men and women are to be blamed equally for these.
We are losing respect for each other and slowly losing faith, and trust is something which does not come easily to us anymore. How could we trust someone with such things constantly happening all around us? It’s only natural that this should happen. This is what our young population is seeing and believing and growing up in, this atmosphere of lies and deception. Respect is something that needs to be instilled in people at a young age or even later for it to be of any benefit to that person. This is simply not happening here anymore, in our society of affairs and broken families and children who grow up without proper care. What is going wrong with our society and why is this happening? I have no definite answers yet for these questions and I doubt anyone does.
Recently, a friend of mine decided to get a divorce for the umpteenth time after her husband continuously kept cheating on her with different women. Every time, she forgives him and gives him one more chance as they have been married for 15 years with three kids. Yet, she is being woken up almost every other night to the sound of phone calls to his mobile from a woman who claims to be ‘just a friend’ at two in the morning and SMSs proclaiming undying love for the husband. Her husband flat out refuses to acknowledge that there is anything going on, even when she catches him with other women occasionally. She still wants to give it a go as is the case with many single mothers here in the Maldives; it is not possible to raise three children alone without a lot of financial help from the father.
In this case as well, the husband, if he respected and cared for the wife, would not have done anything to hurt her or his children. It is not as if she had done anything either, as she is a stay at home mother who gets no free time between taking care of the children and her husband.
According to Family Court Law fathers are ordered to pay the set sum to the Court and the mothers who have custody of the children to collect their dues from the Court. Where fathers repeatedly fail to make Court-ordered child-support, they are penalized by being jailed for a period of 15 days. What good is that? It just makes things worse.
Also our family courts have not come up with a foolproof system for this type of situation and many a single mother with children are either trying to get by without the promised money from the divorced father, or trying to earn a living while raising the children. The laws concerning these needs to be revised as the amount that the father is to pay for the children’s upbringing is just not enough in this day and age. The costs of living expenses are high and a single mother without a job has to struggle with the measly amount that could come or not each month.
Simply filing for divorce does not give respite to the troubled wife either. Our courts would not give a divorce easy as it should be, especially when children are put into the equation and would give due ‘naseyhah’ or advice to both parties and ask them to try once again. I understand that this is done in an effort to bring down the divorce rate in Maldives, as we have already made it into world record books for having the highest divorce rates but this is getting ridiculous. Putting individuals concerned into such difficult situations, without any help or hope of getting to a happier solution, just to bring down the divorce rates and off the world record books is a bit too much.
According to law, you cannot file for divorce again before three months and the wife has to endure this once again for another three months as was the case with Nasheeda. Her husband was cheating on her with another woman. With four kids to take care of after fourteen years of marriage, she could not handle the emotional stress of it on her daily life and wanted the divorce soon. However, she had to endure almost half a year before the court gave her the divorce. She says: ‘It’s not as if they put us into marriage counseling or anything every time we go there when they send us off home so soon. He would continue to do as he wished and nothing would change. If only there was more to it only would this work.”
This is a most common situation here and it is a growing concern. The amount of children who grow up without proper care or love from their parents is too many. Single parents are not able to take care of their children properly while trying to earn a living. Most children do not respect their parents for the way they have been treated during their childhood and they grow up not respecting others and they do not have faith in relationships as obviously they have grown up in such an atmosphere where it is not something that is respected.
Abuse in marriages and relationships is another thing that is common in Maldives. What compels people to abuse their partners? It is considered that sometimes, people who come from such backgrounds tend to abuse others but this is not the case every time.
In a review carried out by the Ministry of Gender, Family Development and Social Security with the support of UNFPA in 2004/2005 of the Maldives Family Law, it was seen that the right of wives to petition for divorce did not necessarily translate to ‘access’ to divorce with only 10.45% of divorce petitions granted in 2000. Court records show that the wives who petitioned the Court for divorce got a favorable outcome only where the husband was ready and willing to give a divorce. In instances where husbands challenged and/or refused to divorce, the women were more often than not forced to go back home with their husbands; quite possibly to a relationship even more strained and harmful than before, due to the ‘crime’ of the wife having challenged the husband in public.
“Divorce was very rarely granted, even if violence or abuse was given as the reason for the petition. Of the cases where the court refused divorce/permission to divorce, 71.43 were wife-initiated petitions, and in all these cases the husbands had not agreed to the divorce. The grounds on which the Court based their decisions did not always reflect the grounds on which the petition was made. For example, 30% of the wife-initiated petitions had explicitly noted “the actions of the husband” - which could be anything from negligence to wife-abuse – as reason for requesting divorce, but the Court records did not reflect any attention to the issue.”
Source: www.planning.gov.mv
This review concludes that the Family Law analysis is far removed from the everyday realities of people. That currently the levels of maintenance are determined according to the circumstances of the husband (former husband) whatever the circumstances of the wife (former wife), which is problematic as it does not address needs in real terms. Further, the burden of providing maintenance falls upon the man regardless of the circumstances of the woman. Maintenance should be assessed and adjusted according to the means and circumstances of the concerned couple.
Why is this happening and why isn’t anyone concerned about this? Perhaps we have evolved past this whole love, care and trust thing now or simply gotten used to accepting that this is a myth. Just like we hear about fairies and unicorns, now we will read about love from books and see it only in movies. It’s not real at all.
Respect, care, love and understanding is something one can achieve through their own actions and attitude, it is something that is earned. One needs to earn the other persons respect. Perhaps this could be where one starts and maybe the rest will come naturally. I believe that our young generation needs good role models to look up to. It all starts at home where the first human experiences children feel are of the family around them. If it is how the children grow up, in a warm, caring environment where everyone respects one another, perhaps they would grow up to be more positive human beings, who respect, honor and above all have empathy for each other. Parents need to be shining examples. They must instruct and train their children on how to love their spouses and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be kind and helpful and respect each other. Perhaps they may have more faith in relationships and all walks of life as grownups.
The Right to Have Rights
Crimes rate is on the rise again, it appears, but sadly this time the crimes being committed aren’t your average burglary or purse snatching. It’s gotten a whole lot worse. It seems we don’t care much for each other these days. Tiny disagreements turn into full out raging fights which sometimes even the police have difficulty breaking up. There is certainly something different in the air. Perhaps it’s just me or is it?
Every other day the newspapers seem to mention a sad or disturbing crime where people are getting hurt and even killed, either by pure recklessness or by hatred. Hate crimes, this is something that is becoming increasingly common among us. It seems that almost everything can be turned around as a reason to start a fight. Our tempers are a bit short and we are constantly losing it. What is really going on?
If one was to try and trace these events to its source then it would be quite impossible to point a finger at any one singular event and hold it responsible. But there is one single event that stands out; one event that has lead to a lot of people being hurt and maybe even directly responsible for many other similar incidents to happen in Male. It is a day that no one in Male will ever forget as long as they live. A violent end to an event that was to bring about something good, offer a chance to make things better, a peaceful struggle asking for justice. So many innocents suffered that day, but hopefully there won’t be a repeat of the same ever again.
It was a fight for freedom, apparently because we are an oppressed people. Until that day most of us had not even realized it. And to this day we are still fighting for it and we have apparently not gotten it still either. We have all seen the websites; if we are to believe what the websites say, anything and everything bad and wrong with the society can apparently be traced to one simple thing. No matter how ridiculous the claim, it is all only one persons fault according to them.
A coconut falls from a tree and lands near the beach where the waves take it away into the lagoon. No one will ever have the pleasure of drinking its mild or eating its flesh. Whose fault is that? Yep, you got it right. There is apparently one man to blame. It hasn’t rained for a long time or the rain hasn’t stopped for a long time. Yep, it’s his fault. According to these websites the world apparently revolves around this single man. But just how simple do we have to be to believe these things?
What about the drag racing that has become so popular on the streets of Male during the night? Pedestrians and anyone else on the streets when the speed junkies take to the streets to get their fix are in danger. Obviously, it is not a concern that goes through the head of these speed freaks. Our roads are considerably small and were not meant for such speeds.
However, few people actually even bother to check their speed. And these racers aren’t limited to cars alone; some bicyclists and motorcyclists aren’t too concerned about checking their speed. In their haste to get a rush out of being reckless, they do not bother to look at what kind of damage they are leaving behind.
You could be walking on the pavement and still be in danger of being hit. The traffic does not move only on the road, just as the pedestrians who leave the tiny pavements sometimes the traffic leaves the crowded roads to slide by other traffic smoothly by coming on to the pavement as well.
When a traffic jam happens, people start honking their horns instantly and incessantly as if this would spur the traffic on. What about the people in the houses nearby who are bothered by the constant honking? Not their problem, right?
Recently, I came upon a crowd of people gathered in front of a shop. As a curious Maldivian, I went over to see what the fuss was all about as there was no way for the traffic to move on anyway. There was a woman screaming at a boy not more than 17 or 18 with her daughter in tow. Turns out that the boy was abusing the little girl and the mom found out from the daughter.
However, while in the middle of this screaming, right before the police came around, a group of people started beating the skinny boy. Granted, he had committed a disgusting crime, one for which he should be punished according to the law, but why take it into your own hands to punish him? To me it seemed as if the people who beat up the kid were more interested in getting a violent rush from beating a helpless boy than they were in seeking justice.
Violence or defiance is never the answer and violence only breeds and brings about more violence. Laws and regulations are there to help people; we need to understand this concept. We are being repeatedly told by the media that we are people with rights. That we deserve to have our rights protected. And that we should fight for our rights.
All well and good, but what about the others? Don’t they have rights too? While fighting for our rights should we trample on the rights of everyone else?
Every other day the newspapers seem to mention a sad or disturbing crime where people are getting hurt and even killed, either by pure recklessness or by hatred. Hate crimes, this is something that is becoming increasingly common among us. It seems that almost everything can be turned around as a reason to start a fight. Our tempers are a bit short and we are constantly losing it. What is really going on?
If one was to try and trace these events to its source then it would be quite impossible to point a finger at any one singular event and hold it responsible. But there is one single event that stands out; one event that has lead to a lot of people being hurt and maybe even directly responsible for many other similar incidents to happen in Male. It is a day that no one in Male will ever forget as long as they live. A violent end to an event that was to bring about something good, offer a chance to make things better, a peaceful struggle asking for justice. So many innocents suffered that day, but hopefully there won’t be a repeat of the same ever again.
It was a fight for freedom, apparently because we are an oppressed people. Until that day most of us had not even realized it. And to this day we are still fighting for it and we have apparently not gotten it still either. We have all seen the websites; if we are to believe what the websites say, anything and everything bad and wrong with the society can apparently be traced to one simple thing. No matter how ridiculous the claim, it is all only one persons fault according to them.
A coconut falls from a tree and lands near the beach where the waves take it away into the lagoon. No one will ever have the pleasure of drinking its mild or eating its flesh. Whose fault is that? Yep, you got it right. There is apparently one man to blame. It hasn’t rained for a long time or the rain hasn’t stopped for a long time. Yep, it’s his fault. According to these websites the world apparently revolves around this single man. But just how simple do we have to be to believe these things?
What about the drag racing that has become so popular on the streets of Male during the night? Pedestrians and anyone else on the streets when the speed junkies take to the streets to get their fix are in danger. Obviously, it is not a concern that goes through the head of these speed freaks. Our roads are considerably small and were not meant for such speeds.
However, few people actually even bother to check their speed. And these racers aren’t limited to cars alone; some bicyclists and motorcyclists aren’t too concerned about checking their speed. In their haste to get a rush out of being reckless, they do not bother to look at what kind of damage they are leaving behind.
You could be walking on the pavement and still be in danger of being hit. The traffic does not move only on the road, just as the pedestrians who leave the tiny pavements sometimes the traffic leaves the crowded roads to slide by other traffic smoothly by coming on to the pavement as well.
When a traffic jam happens, people start honking their horns instantly and incessantly as if this would spur the traffic on. What about the people in the houses nearby who are bothered by the constant honking? Not their problem, right?
Recently, I came upon a crowd of people gathered in front of a shop. As a curious Maldivian, I went over to see what the fuss was all about as there was no way for the traffic to move on anyway. There was a woman screaming at a boy not more than 17 or 18 with her daughter in tow. Turns out that the boy was abusing the little girl and the mom found out from the daughter.
However, while in the middle of this screaming, right before the police came around, a group of people started beating the skinny boy. Granted, he had committed a disgusting crime, one for which he should be punished according to the law, but why take it into your own hands to punish him? To me it seemed as if the people who beat up the kid were more interested in getting a violent rush from beating a helpless boy than they were in seeking justice.
Violence or defiance is never the answer and violence only breeds and brings about more violence. Laws and regulations are there to help people; we need to understand this concept. We are being repeatedly told by the media that we are people with rights. That we deserve to have our rights protected. And that we should fight for our rights.
All well and good, but what about the others? Don’t they have rights too? While fighting for our rights should we trample on the rights of everyone else?
Clothes Make the Person
08 August 2006
Just around the corner in every woman’s mind - is a lovely dress, a wonderful suit, or entire costume which will make an enchanting new creature of her. ~Wilhela Cushman
Some days back I found myself stuck in traffic when I noticed that everyone, well all the men anyway, were straining their necks trying to look at a girl who was sitting on the backseat of a cycle near me. Curious, I also turned to look too. Now, I am not one of those women who thinks skinny is beautiful. Skinny is just that: skinny. This woman was not skinny. However, she was not fat either. Some men nearby started commenting loudly about her revealing clothes and they weren’t very shy about making their opinions clear.
Sad to say, but it was true. She was wearing something that would be considered quite revealing even on the beaches of Brazil, and the overall look wasn’t all that flattering to her either. I assumed that she must be on her way to a party or something, because I could not think of any other reason why she would be out on the roads in the outrageous attire. She was wearing a micro miniskirt that was so small that it would have graduated to nano miniskirt status if it had been even a millimeter higher and her underwear was also visible from the back. The straps on her shoulders were straining her muscles and it looked like the muscles were winning. She probably heard all the comments being said about her and was urging the guy in front, possibly her boyfriend, to ride through the red light. A good 10 seconds before the light turned green, the cycle raced off, as is common here in Male.
What bothered me about this whole thing was the fact that, despite all the exposure and everything, she could have dressed better. For one thing, if she wanted to wear such revealing clothes, she should not let such comments bother her. Secondly, with such a low skirt, how come she opted for such huge underwear? She could have gone with one of the underwear that is specifically being sold for such skirts and jeans. It’s one thing to dress up, but quite another to dress up in such a way that does not either flatter or enhance your own beauty and show off your best assets. With all the information sources available to us like the TV, magazines and the internet, why not do some type of research or learn about it before strutting off outside in the first piece that someone else looked good in?
It’s not just women who dress up in such outrageous clothes these days. Men are often seen wearing jeans so loose it seems in danger of being left behind without their knowledge while they are walking on the road. Then there are those who feel confident enough about their physique to parade around in see through shirts, despite the fact they could be mistaken for a runaway skeleton from a laboratory. If there were fashion police around, people will be getting arrested left and right! So what is it that is making our society commit all these fashion crimes?
Well, it happens everywhere. Only, in some places, it’s called trends and when it comes to a country like ours where it doesn’t fit in anywhere and isn’t accepted, this is what happens. You get ridiculed for going out looking like an idiot. People need to learn to dress to fit our society, the one we live in. Dressing up like people in Hollywood or someone on a catwalk just don’t actually do it for you here. Everyone needs to learn to dress appropriately wherever they go. Dressing up in a mini with clown like make up at seven in the morning for work is not considered apt attire.
Wearing the veil is now the latest fashion around and almost every other person wears it. However, this is supposed to be worn in a specific way which is not how everyone is doing it. There are people who wear skin tight jeans or bellbottoms with tops that fit just as tight and then wear a veil.
If I am not wrong, isn’t the veil supposed to be worn in a way that the woman’s figure is not apparent? I do not mean wearing a huge black garb from head to toe, but loose fitting clothes would be much more appropriate for a person wearing the veil, don’t you think?
Image is something that can either make or break you. Most attire worn on television is not appropriate for business environments. Don’t be deluded. Remember, first impressions do count mostly despite what you may believe, unless you are able to change it later on with hard work. Here are some tips that might help when dressing up.
When dressing up for work, it is always good for women to dress in crisp, clean, neatly pressed clothes that fit well and is appropriate for a day at work and even for a chance meeting with a CEO. It should not look like something you will wear to a party. Avoid, too tight or baggy clothes, instead opt for casual classic and trendy clothes such as pants, neatly pressed, and a pressed long-sleeved, buttoned solid shirt are safe for both men and women. The most commonly worn kurtha and Pakistani dresses are also appropriate as well. However, it is common to see these with too much embroidery, less is good as far as this goes. Simple designs are more appropriate.
Basically, choose clothes that fit well and remain in place while sitting and/or walking. Less is more. Avoid extremes of style and color. Fit should not be tight. Cleavage is not appropriate for work, and probably not appropriate for anywhere in Maldives, but of course it’s your call. When wearing makeup, keep it conservative and natural looking. A little is usually better than none for a polished look. Nails should be clean and well groomed. Avoid extremes of nail length and polish color, especially in conservative offices. Shoes should be leather or fabric/micro fiber that can be cleaned and for the most conservative look, wear something that covers your toes.
Sandals which are neither extremely dressy nor extremely casual might be appropriate. Make certain you can walk comfortably in your shoes; hobbling around the office in shoes that are pinching your feet does not convey a professional image. Select apparel, fragrances, jewelry, hairstyle, etc. that do not detract from your professional image. Hair should be neat, clean and professionally styled. Avoid styles that cover over more than your forehead or one that you have to brush back. Believe me, if you are dressed in a respectable way, people will tend to respect you and take you more seriously.
Most of the people working in the private offices do not have a set dress code and it is up to the individual to dress appropriately for work. For men, who do have to wear ties, opt for something that does not have Mickey Mouse or such comical stuff on it. Instead, opt for a design that is abstract and simple. Wear dark socks, mid-calf length so no skin is visible when you sit down. Shoes should be in polished condition. Make sure heels are not worn out. No sandals, athletic shoes or hiking boots. Facial hair should be well-groomed if you decide to go for that kind of look.
Know your industry and how conservative it is; observe men in your industry if you are unsure what’s appropriate or are considering changing your look. Wear a conservative watch. If you choose to wear other jewelry, be conservative. Seriously, we have not come into an era where it is acceptable for men to wear earrings at work, so no earrings or piercing with jewellery on it. No odors on clothes; that means don’t walk in smelling of cigarette. It’s common for most people to go out for coffees and come back into the office smelling you’ve eaten a pack of cigarettes. This is something that could most probably annoy or offend the rest of the non-smoking office mates.
If dressing up for a party or such, make sure the message you convey is something that reflects you, in a good way. Meaning, don’t wear revealing clothes unless of course the message you want to give is that you are available and not too picky about who comes looking. You can dress up without wearing revealing clothes. Leave something up to the imagination and dress up appropriately.
Men, wear something that would attract attention in a positive way. This depends on the party and the situation. When choosing something for yourselves, make sure you get the opinion of someone who is trustworthy, like a family member or a close friend. You can’t go wrong there right? They would tell you what’s acceptable and what’s not. Besides that, you can take a look around our society and understand what would be acceptable here, for any occasion.
Whatever you wear let your image be a reflection of the person you are, a respectable person who demands the respect of others. Image is very important.
Just around the corner in every woman’s mind - is a lovely dress, a wonderful suit, or entire costume which will make an enchanting new creature of her. ~Wilhela Cushman
Some days back I found myself stuck in traffic when I noticed that everyone, well all the men anyway, were straining their necks trying to look at a girl who was sitting on the backseat of a cycle near me. Curious, I also turned to look too. Now, I am not one of those women who thinks skinny is beautiful. Skinny is just that: skinny. This woman was not skinny. However, she was not fat either. Some men nearby started commenting loudly about her revealing clothes and they weren’t very shy about making their opinions clear.
Sad to say, but it was true. She was wearing something that would be considered quite revealing even on the beaches of Brazil, and the overall look wasn’t all that flattering to her either. I assumed that she must be on her way to a party or something, because I could not think of any other reason why she would be out on the roads in the outrageous attire. She was wearing a micro miniskirt that was so small that it would have graduated to nano miniskirt status if it had been even a millimeter higher and her underwear was also visible from the back. The straps on her shoulders were straining her muscles and it looked like the muscles were winning. She probably heard all the comments being said about her and was urging the guy in front, possibly her boyfriend, to ride through the red light. A good 10 seconds before the light turned green, the cycle raced off, as is common here in Male.
What bothered me about this whole thing was the fact that, despite all the exposure and everything, she could have dressed better. For one thing, if she wanted to wear such revealing clothes, she should not let such comments bother her. Secondly, with such a low skirt, how come she opted for such huge underwear? She could have gone with one of the underwear that is specifically being sold for such skirts and jeans. It’s one thing to dress up, but quite another to dress up in such a way that does not either flatter or enhance your own beauty and show off your best assets. With all the information sources available to us like the TV, magazines and the internet, why not do some type of research or learn about it before strutting off outside in the first piece that someone else looked good in?
It’s not just women who dress up in such outrageous clothes these days. Men are often seen wearing jeans so loose it seems in danger of being left behind without their knowledge while they are walking on the road. Then there are those who feel confident enough about their physique to parade around in see through shirts, despite the fact they could be mistaken for a runaway skeleton from a laboratory. If there were fashion police around, people will be getting arrested left and right! So what is it that is making our society commit all these fashion crimes?
Well, it happens everywhere. Only, in some places, it’s called trends and when it comes to a country like ours where it doesn’t fit in anywhere and isn’t accepted, this is what happens. You get ridiculed for going out looking like an idiot. People need to learn to dress to fit our society, the one we live in. Dressing up like people in Hollywood or someone on a catwalk just don’t actually do it for you here. Everyone needs to learn to dress appropriately wherever they go. Dressing up in a mini with clown like make up at seven in the morning for work is not considered apt attire.
Wearing the veil is now the latest fashion around and almost every other person wears it. However, this is supposed to be worn in a specific way which is not how everyone is doing it. There are people who wear skin tight jeans or bellbottoms with tops that fit just as tight and then wear a veil.
If I am not wrong, isn’t the veil supposed to be worn in a way that the woman’s figure is not apparent? I do not mean wearing a huge black garb from head to toe, but loose fitting clothes would be much more appropriate for a person wearing the veil, don’t you think?
Image is something that can either make or break you. Most attire worn on television is not appropriate for business environments. Don’t be deluded. Remember, first impressions do count mostly despite what you may believe, unless you are able to change it later on with hard work. Here are some tips that might help when dressing up.
When dressing up for work, it is always good for women to dress in crisp, clean, neatly pressed clothes that fit well and is appropriate for a day at work and even for a chance meeting with a CEO. It should not look like something you will wear to a party. Avoid, too tight or baggy clothes, instead opt for casual classic and trendy clothes such as pants, neatly pressed, and a pressed long-sleeved, buttoned solid shirt are safe for both men and women. The most commonly worn kurtha and Pakistani dresses are also appropriate as well. However, it is common to see these with too much embroidery, less is good as far as this goes. Simple designs are more appropriate.
Basically, choose clothes that fit well and remain in place while sitting and/or walking. Less is more. Avoid extremes of style and color. Fit should not be tight. Cleavage is not appropriate for work, and probably not appropriate for anywhere in Maldives, but of course it’s your call. When wearing makeup, keep it conservative and natural looking. A little is usually better than none for a polished look. Nails should be clean and well groomed. Avoid extremes of nail length and polish color, especially in conservative offices. Shoes should be leather or fabric/micro fiber that can be cleaned and for the most conservative look, wear something that covers your toes.
Sandals which are neither extremely dressy nor extremely casual might be appropriate. Make certain you can walk comfortably in your shoes; hobbling around the office in shoes that are pinching your feet does not convey a professional image. Select apparel, fragrances, jewelry, hairstyle, etc. that do not detract from your professional image. Hair should be neat, clean and professionally styled. Avoid styles that cover over more than your forehead or one that you have to brush back. Believe me, if you are dressed in a respectable way, people will tend to respect you and take you more seriously.
Most of the people working in the private offices do not have a set dress code and it is up to the individual to dress appropriately for work. For men, who do have to wear ties, opt for something that does not have Mickey Mouse or such comical stuff on it. Instead, opt for a design that is abstract and simple. Wear dark socks, mid-calf length so no skin is visible when you sit down. Shoes should be in polished condition. Make sure heels are not worn out. No sandals, athletic shoes or hiking boots. Facial hair should be well-groomed if you decide to go for that kind of look.
Know your industry and how conservative it is; observe men in your industry if you are unsure what’s appropriate or are considering changing your look. Wear a conservative watch. If you choose to wear other jewelry, be conservative. Seriously, we have not come into an era where it is acceptable for men to wear earrings at work, so no earrings or piercing with jewellery on it. No odors on clothes; that means don’t walk in smelling of cigarette. It’s common for most people to go out for coffees and come back into the office smelling you’ve eaten a pack of cigarettes. This is something that could most probably annoy or offend the rest of the non-smoking office mates.
If dressing up for a party or such, make sure the message you convey is something that reflects you, in a good way. Meaning, don’t wear revealing clothes unless of course the message you want to give is that you are available and not too picky about who comes looking. You can dress up without wearing revealing clothes. Leave something up to the imagination and dress up appropriately.
Men, wear something that would attract attention in a positive way. This depends on the party and the situation. When choosing something for yourselves, make sure you get the opinion of someone who is trustworthy, like a family member or a close friend. You can’t go wrong there right? They would tell you what’s acceptable and what’s not. Besides that, you can take a look around our society and understand what would be acceptable here, for any occasion.
Whatever you wear let your image be a reflection of the person you are, a respectable person who demands the respect of others. Image is very important.
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